Brace yourself, kids, the episode begins with Kirsten. And she's cooking! Insisting that the family eats her eggs benedict, our favorite housewife is desperate for some culinary care. The situation is diffused, however, when Dr. Kim calls Sandy. She informs the sage one that Ryan is allowed to attend that evening's college fair, but the mean, omnipotent Dean Hess has attached a letter to his transcript that refers to "pathological violent behavior." This is a problem.
At Harbor, Summer concocts a story to Taylor about the immoral, horny Dean Hess lip locking with the gym teacher. Taylor treats it with terror. Meanwhile, Ryan has lunch at the crummy public school and befriends Johnny. Also making friends are Julie and Charlotte. The former faux Boston high school teacher actually buys a condo for Julie, claiming that she doesn't want anything in return. The Files aren't sure if it believes this supposedly good Charlotte or not.
After going to the college fair, but being rebuffed by the cruel, satanic Dean Hess about removing the malicious letter, Ryan leaves. He goes so far to cancel his tutor, drop out of high school and look for a job. Fortunately, Johnny is on the spot and offers him a gig on his uncle's fishing boat.
Despite the possibility of enjoying shrimp cocktail ... shrimp burgers ... shrimp scamp, no one is very excited about this occupation because it involves Ryan being gone at sea for weeks at a time. Sandy, though, is supportive. Marissa, conversely, musters every inch of her 47-pound frame to tell Ryan that she isn't very pleased about his running away.
Very pleased with her scheming, on the other hand, is Summer. She tricks Taylor to trek over to the hotel made famous by Luke and Julie (ooohh yeah!) and confronts her about the Hess hook up. Later that day, Sandy bluffs his way into the terrible, awful, no good, very bad Dean's office by claiming he has pictures of the kiss and lying about Taylor's accusations that she was taken advantage of. All of this makes Summer's previous plans perfectly necessary, of course. In the end, the story lines are rolled into a nice, logical ball when Ryan decides to remain on land and is informed that he's also enrolled in Harbor again. He may, however, have to return to Kirsten's cooking at some point.
"The Perfect Storm" File: